...i've been doing some soul searching...

Currently listening to: Someone Like You - Susan Wong

.thelightsofwinter.
Federation Square, Melbourne, June 4 2008

So this very particular song *points at song status above the pic* has been mentally put on continuous loop in my head ever since, like, I dunno, yesterday night or so?
Blame the oh-so-inspiring walk around Federation Square with my two favorite people the other night for this latest symptom of obsession. *wink wink*

Well not that I actually wanna blame 'em for that matter; I actually had a very good time there, just wandering around, starting at the beautiful, glimmering lights, blowing out breath vapors casually into the winter-y air, digging my hands deeper into my coat pockets, and other mellow-jellow stuff you'll get disgusted about.

It's good to be a hopeless romantic during the freezing heights of winter. *grins*

Yet it sucks ass to realize that the mere state of being deeply inspired doesn't necessarily mean that I will be able to make the best use of it and really do anything productive. And the process of trying to interpret ideas into well-written words and fluent paragraphs can be particularly hard to do, especially when this lazy-ass person doing so hasn't actually been writing that much during the last one year and two months.
You know, writing as in doing-some-real-piece-of-literature kind of writing, not writing as in periodically rambling-in-a-public-bitchfest-blog kind of writing.

Long story short, I've basically been struggling my way in pouring my emotions into some kind of a decent short story. One page so far, out of I don't know how many more. It gets more annoying when, no pun intended, I find it even bloody damn harder to write in my own mother tongue.

I mean, I used to believe that writing stories and pieces in English would be cheesy as I didn't regard myself as being that competent in using the language then, but now after like a LOOOOOONG period of hiatus from this particular hobby, I guess I'd subconsciously given myself a once-over and, dunno, perhaps had my lingo capabilities switched over?

Whatever. All I know is that I'm suffering from a major writer's block and can't do anything to escape from it. Nothing just seems right, and I bitterly feel that I'm losing my touch.
Hence the song-being-mentally-put-on-loop state of mind I mentioned above.
I'm a nutcase, I know. Bear with it. *sighs*

Damn. I need coffee.
I don't know what can possibly happen to my state of being if I keep my caffeine consumption rate at this crazy intake density. But every writer needs his muse. And I can only hope that those adorable brownish black beans of inspiration can at least perform their simple magic to clear up the writer's block clouds that are hovering above my head as I speak, and can finally let me write on in peace. Please.

Have a nice week, guys!
Notice that this time I cheerfully mean it. *laughs*

And oh yeah, for us university slaves waiting anxiously for the publication of results this Friday, may I remind you to start preparing our racing minds and worried hearts, and let the panic attacks and sleepless nights begin. *sighs*

PS: On a sidenote, I have this freaky junior guy constantly messaging me on Facebook, asking me what I'm doing and where I am and a whole bunch of freaky, unimportant stuff. Been trying to ignore him and act cool, but he just doesn't stop. I swear he's driving me nuts. I mean, like, come on, lay off the look-at-me I-wanna-be-cool attitude and get the eff off my virtual property, kiddo. We may only be communicating through the Internet but you still terribly piss me off. *shrugs*